Tag Archives: behaviour change

Top 10 ways to turn off a self-respecting woman

11 Aug

Men, it’s time for a perspective change. To prepare yourselves for this, you first must consider yourself by thinking about the degree to which you can focus on something. Next, think of other men and how intense you may have noticed they can be when concentrating on reaching a goal. Got it? Now, put a bunch of these men in a room and put drinks in their hands.

I want you to now imagine that you’re a single woman in the same room and think about what it might be like to be the target of this intense and intoxicated masculine focus. If you can do this, you may be able to understand why single, self-respecting women choose to remain single.

1.  When she’s standing at a bar, make sure to confine her space – i.e. barricade her with arms and elbows.

2.  Walk up to her, introduce yourself, and follow with “wanna shag?”

3. Assume that she wants you to paw her, just because she said hello back.

4. Put your hand up her dress.

5. Ask the woman if she’s married, what her sexual orientation is, and make comments like, “with a body like that, you mustn’t have any children.”

6. Keep talking to her and hang around her though she isn’t even making eye contact with you.

7. Get really drunk and flash a wad of cash around, making sure she’s seen it at least 3 times. Try not to stagger while you do this.

8.  Get really drunk, walk over to a woman with whom you’ve never spoke, grab her by the arm, drag her to the dance floor, and force her to dance with you.

9. Get really drunk and interrupt the conversation you’re having with the woman to get into a fist fight with another drunk guy.

10. Exclaim “Don’t leave me!” when she turns to walk away.

* All items in this list are are true and actually happened to me. I’m sorry to report that 6 of these 10 points happened in one night not too long ago.